Tis The Season.

We’re having a bit of a horror-movie-fest here, these days. Hallowe’en is the time where, even if you’re not a horror fan, you tend to watch a few.

So, the plan for the next few weeks is to sit down, pretty much nightly, and instead of just turning on the background drone of sitcoms, gaming news and reviews, news, and home renovation shows, to find a few good (or bad, as the case may be) horror flicks.

I have a flirting relationship with horror. I’m not a true fan, but some stuff really floats my boat (or balloon: They all float down here, Georgie!). Zombies, creature-features in general, and the ‘classics’, definitely do it. Torture-porn does not.

Monday, I checked out Feast. Now, I gotta say, for me, this is what an entertaining horror flick should be. There’s some comedy, some blood, some jump scares, and some fairly creative shooting. It’s a well-worn idea (basically, a standoff, a la Alamo, or Titty twister). It’s got some great touches though, especially early on. I’m generally not a fan of sequels, but this one… Yeah, I’m going to be checking out episodes two and three, for sure. I’ll give Feast a solid 4 out of 5.

Tuesday night, Jennifer’s Body. I’ve been avoiding this one. And not because of Megan Fox. It just looked schlocky.

And it totally was. But in a really, really watchable, enjoyable way. Can you see the end coming? Totally. Do you care? Not at all. 3.5 out of 5. Definitely worth catching, as it’s on Netflix.

Wednesday night: Silver Bullet. I’d forgotten how much fun that flick was, and it was well enjoyed.

Nearly six months ago, as the summer blockbuster season started, I wrote a piece about how summer, movies, and me all come together, and my childhood with movies. I only got around to posting it recently, but something in it is relevant to this discussion: For some reason, one of the flicks that always sticks out in my childhood is The Gate, which is, by the way, a truly, truly terrible, awful and yet slightly endearing PG13 horror flick. That one, it’s not about the movie for me, it’s about the associations with the movie. I promise, I will post that piece, very late, and very out of context (I never put it up anywhere, just never got around to it) given the time frame I was writing in and about, but still. it’ll give you all (all, what, six of you, these days) an idea of what I look for in movies.

The thing is, back to the topic at hand, I have to pick and choose horror carefully. Because TheGirl(tm) is watching them this week too. And she is very, very much not a horror fan.

I recently introduced her to Poltergeist. One of the comments she kept making was “Wow, that’s SO cliché”; I had to keep reminding her that while she was right, this was actually one of the movies that the modern horror clichés came from. It should also be noted that she really enjoyed Jennifer’s Body; I watched Feast without her.

The tone is set then.

The question is, with Hallowe’en still ten days away, what else do I introduce her to that won’t put her off entirely, but is still actually entertaining?

There are a bunch of movies that still scare the bejebus out of me, in a fun way. They’re almost all classics (and I use the term loosely) of the genre.

  • Nightmare on Elm Street
  • Wes Craven’s New Nightmare
  • The Exorcist
  • Candyman

    Then, there’s the schlock that hits the tropes, but isn’t really horror:

  • Evil Dead
  • Army of Darkness
  • Ghostbusters

    I have a grave feeling (oh, I’m punny!) that both Ghostbusters and Army of Darkness will get watched on Saturday. They’re fun, perennial favorites, and it’s my birthday. Everyone I know knows every line in both of those movies, so it should work out really well.

    But what else?

    I don’t know if I can get her to watch the Exorcist. I never had any huge love for the Hallowe’en movies. I’m tempted to skip over the the entire slasher genre, and go straight to either Jason X, and Freddy vs Jason: both of which are wonderfully schlocky, bloody, and pretty hysterical, with decent production values thrown in there too.

    I’m thinking maybe The Stuff: I’ve not seen that in years. And maybe the 80’s version of Invasion of the Body Snatchers which is still downright creepy. And elhulk has suggested PuppetMaster, which I loved growin’ up, and Ghoulies.

    Decisions, decisions, decisions.

    I gotta admit, horror is not my thing when it comes to movies. I enjoy ’em, but it’s not my primary go. The big admission on this is, I tried watching A Haunting in Conneticut a few weeks ago, and the whole vibe to it creeped me out so much I turned it off half way through. Eventually, I’ll get to the whole thing but DAMN. Every creak just freaked me out! I’m such a puss. And all that said, it seemed really well shot and acted, as much as I watched. Which, really, was part of the problem. Disbelief, suspended. Mark, terrified.

    What? I love these movies, but it didn’t stop me sleeping with my light on for three days after I saw Nightmare on Elm Street for the first time when I was thirteen.

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